To My Dearest Son Braedon, It’s been two years, 24 months, 730 agonizing days, 17,520 hours, two birthdays, two Christmases, two Easter's, two Mother’s Days, two Father's Days since you were called home. It feels like a thousand years since I was able to look into your sparkling eyes, see a room light up with … Continue reading 17,520 hours Since we Had to Say Goodbye
Do you have kids the salesman asked? No, I awkwardly reply. It just feels wrong to burden a stranger in this way. To bring him into my world and leave him lost for words to say; feeling guilty over something he had no part of and can do nothing about. No. It doesn’t seem right … Continue reading Still a Mom: For all the Momma’s who are Grieving this Mother’s Day
My Struggle is Real I’ve been quiet this last week. I’ve struggled to focus and struggled to show up here and in my life. This has become a part of my life now more so than ever before. Suddenly it’s like everything boils over at once and I can’t control it. The grief, PTSD and … Continue reading Are you Willing to give Yourself Grace?
Losing Braedon was a complete shock to me and to everyone who loved him. What many people don’t realize is that Braedon before he passed he was a living miracle. In 2007, Braedon experienced his first life-threatening illness and doctors didn’t think he’d make it. He had a rare blood infection that caused him to … Continue reading 6 Ways I take care of my Mental Health & Where you can find Support!
Where do I even begin? You were home to some of the best and some of the worst moments and days of my life. You wrapped up a twisted wild ride and delivered it over a decade. I experienced more love and joy than I ever dreamed possible. I became a doer, a seeker and … Continue reading To the Decade that Tried to Break Me!
My eyes were closed, my lips trembled and a few tears overflowed dispite my best effort to keep them abayas. I focused on my breath. Deep breaths. Slow breaths. Inhaling through my nose, filling my chest and releasing through my mouth as I tried to keep it together. Although I was sitting uncomfortably in hard … Continue reading Changed by Loss
#100BRAVETHINGS #19 This past Sunday I was #bravelikebraedon and completed #100bravethings #19 at Be the Balance Retreat. I took the stage in front of an audience of 130; over four times the size of the largest crowd I had previously spoken in front of. As the speaker up before me took the stage I could … Continue reading THE HARDEST WORDS I’VE EVER SAID OUT LOUD
Even Though I'm Living Every Parents Worst Nightmare Even though I had to live through another holiday without Braedon. Even though I had an amazing weekend with my family but still felt unbelievable lonely. Even though I smiled while quietly aching under the surface. Even though I woke today feeling incredibly empty, I also felt … Continue reading Creating Light in Darkness: Gratitude Through Loss